DYNAMICS OF SUCCESS

My dear friend Calvin seems to be very perturbed and distraught as is evident from his blog. It has been established that he has a burning desire to succeed in life….to make it. Sometimes I have wondered what is it that makes people successful. Is the desire and the need to be successful enough for people to become winners. I dont think so because every human being desires to be successful but everyone doesnt make it. Then again I am talking about the preconceived notion of success which is judged by various materialistic parameters such as wealth, status and position in society and others……

Success is highly relative. I mean a father who has probably educated his children and provided for his family on a meagre income will consider himself successful at the end of his life and no one can shake that notion. No comparison to all the millionaires of the world is going to change his notion if he believes from his heart and soul that he is a successful man. This is how success can be calculated at a more individual and personal level free from all the materialistic parameters.

So lets talk about material success. What constitutesa successful person of this order?

We have all learnt about Abraham Malsow and his heirarchy of needs. It is incomprehensible to me how a brilliant man like Maslow could ever define such complex creatures as us human beings in terms of a three edged pointed triangle- closed from all corners. His triangle ends at self with the needs for self actualization. Are all humans such selfish creatures to start with self and also end with self. I think the most fundamental quality that all successful men and women have is the ability to go beyond oneself. They all have a vision greater than oneself. It encompasses them and the things and human beings around them. They not only realize their full potential in life but also the potential of things and resources around them living or non living. As I have said before this in simple terms means that they all have a vision.

I truly believe that when one wants to convert a vision into reality- one has to be appallingly insane and has to firmly believe that everyhting impossible is but one day possible. Without this insanity fear takes the hold on more than 90% of humans who wish to be successful in life. If you are not insane fear will conquer you and you will get stuck in Maslow’s little triangular prison. This insanity in simple terms is called passion.

The word failure does not exist in their vocabulary. If you eliminate the word, you eliminate the fear surrounding it. When someone is born visually challenged, they are not aware of what colours are. They see things in terms of black, white and grey. What they dont see, they dont long for. If you eliminate failure from your vocabulary everything will either be a success or a good attempt at it but nothing shall ever be a failure. That is why successful people have always thought that they were born to win because the idea of losing never struck them!!!!

All successful people know that they are not superheroes. If you want to make an empire it is not possible for one person to do this. So you need to be unselfish, have a lot of respect and praise for other peoples strong points and in the end learn to exploit just that. They never undervalue knowledge. If they are not able to get it on their own they employ other peoples knowledge to their  advantage.

Everybody goes through hardships. Some big some small. Successful people are so focused on their vision that hardships dont really bother them. They are like annoying mosquitoes that buzz near your face and one sweep of a hand can eliminate them. If you make a big deal of the hardships they will bog you down, distort your vision and you will notice that you are being surrounded by more and more of them.

All the above points are my opinions. There is much more and I will write a book a book on that eventually  So be rest assured that becoming materialistically successful in life is not difficult at all. It is just not everyones cup of tea.

 

musings

Well its been quite a while since i vented out through my blog , as usaual my life still continues to be a roller coaster ride . I am sure people reading this will be of the opinion that “its comman place” well i wish i could explain my life and its ups and downs .I am not going to cause i think from where i am right now there can be nothing but am up , if there has to be somthing down then it can only be lose of some organ or something of that magnitude.! Well this blog is not about me right now , its not about my feelings right now i think more importantly these words that i write are a testament of whats gonna comes, that i am not letting life bog me down i am going to fight it like i always have though this time its gonna be like none i have encountered its gonna be the biggest comback( if thats the term ) i have ever done . I have had some pretty good turnovers in my past like coming back from being thrown out of my PG just the day before my KCET exam i slept the night in the manipal bus stand , kept my luggage in the KMC hospital general ward next to an accomdating patient , dusted myself and wrote the exams on two days the next night again sleeping on KMC greens . I did way above my and my fellow friends expectations.

Thats one of the least embarrsing comebacks in my life , there have been some which i am ashamed of even saying but in the end i turned out ok !! and now am gonna (hopefully) come back from this slump . The most important lesson i learnt from all these things in my life is that ” Time is the best healer ” and never stop trying NEVER stop trying .The best of the best in any of the business have been the best hustlers they will go all the way to get what they want . I have read biographies , i have seen successful people (in daily life) and everyone of them has been thrown down to the dirt and they have just bounced back like nothing happened to get a grip of their life and steered it in the way they wanted to .

I am sure everyone has heard the stanford speech by(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1R-jKKp3NA) steve jobs i think he sums up someone who took control of his life than let people dictate it . There are a lot of quotes out there which glorify failure as being the stepping stones to success , i think thats crap . Its only when you learn from those mistakes and regardless somehow use tha experience to change your life around is what i call success . And usually the saying goes the lower you fall the higher you rise , which is again crap , i have been down there and let me tell you its not the best place to be cause people shun you , like a parasite the same people who once were eager to talk to you , repel you . But all that is nothing compared to the weight of your own expectations when you know you can do something but cannot do it , thats what kills you everysecond .I have found that the best thing to do is get up and start working if you cannot work for a day or so take a break see a movie meet friends ( trust me the truest friends are the ones who still stick by you not with just sypmathy in their eyes but with hope and happiness that will light you up — no one needs sympathy ) .

I have seen some brilliant minds being wasted into obscurity because they were afraid to take the plunge , i ask if its not you who is going to take the plunge and do somthing you want who will , God has give you a good brain use it to better the world , i am also a victim of this same thought its tough to break the shackles especially if you come from a place like india where the pressure to be stable in your life is very high both from parents and the increasing competition around you as every second person is as smart as you or might be better . I sometimes cringe when i eat a bagel worth 1.25$ and think about my dad who used to use to eat a tomato a day cause he couldnt afford anything else and if lucky to get rice would squeeze the tomato into water and use that as rasam , and still at the end of it he had a MA, Dcom, LLB , ICWA ,Bcom ( all night school while he worked as a mechanic in HAL) he ended up being a HOD of the finance department of a major port of india . These for me are real life heros another amzing story is this story of J-MAc (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yTmcJ9Brxno) its not much but its about sticking there and never giving up .

Calvin

UNEMPLOYED AND NOT SEEKING

Dear All

All refers to all those people in this world who have time to read my sorry blogs except calvin and myself……..

I have finally quit my job after writing sob stories about it in my previous blogs. It wasnt all that bad. I just did not want it. Anyways now awaiting better things in life. I am actually not looking forward to all this time that I have on my hands at the moment. I almost always end up nourishing my over – nourished body even more. Not good. My dad cribs that he has to spend money on my cullinary indulgences and then later spend money to get my butt slimmer.

So now I am coming up with innovative ways to spend all this time that I have.  Calvin just had a superb idea. He suggested we could sit and watch Indian soaps the whole bloody day. Now mind you he is just saying that bacause he doesnt even have time to take a peaceful dump…..who would subject themselves to the torture of Indian soaps otherwise.

So coming back to my present situation. I now go to the gym regularly. I have to rather. My mum wakes me up daily not wth a “Good Morning” but with how much she has spent for the gym fees. So there I am breathless every day at the gym at seven thirty in the morning. I know what you are thinking……unemployed souls must not be subjected to this misery of waking up so early in the morning……it is for the poor souls with jobs….those who have to hit the gym so early because they dont get time for the rest of the day.

And I am also going to join a dance studio to learn to dance funky jazz (sounds cool, I have no clue what style that is exactly) and hip hop (now thats more like it). Now comes the boring part. I agree being unemployed can be seriously addictive. But one does have to think about the future especiallty after one’s dad has decided to stop paying one’s credit card bills……………SCAAARYYYY!!!!!!

So I am working on a business plan now. All information is top secret….classified…..requesting Calvin to not make mention of this on Facebook……………;-)

I finally paln to start my own business and am darn serious about it. Enough of working for others. Now I want to be my own boss…. gosh I seriously sound like somebody who has been working for years. But ya so I am up to my head in financial books to refresh my accounting and financial lingo. Going out to do market surveys myself because I cannot afford a market analyst. I am a very multi-tasking, genius individual and so I can manage all these things…………beware sharp comments from Calvin expected on this one…:-)

Anyways I will keep you guys updated on this next adventure that I have already undertaken. Wish me all the best…….thanks…..muchas gracias…….

TOO DAMN TIRED

aaaaaaaaah…..work is killing me

At such times I truly wish I was a millionaire or atleast my dad was one……god bless him….he has done more than enough for me……

I work at one of the busiest convention and events hotel in Asia……we are currently severely shortstaffed……..and I am overburdened and underpaid…..wow everythings just so perfect…………..there is no use complaining…..i take it a it comes….there is only so much one person can do

At such times are dream of blue seas and cloudy skies…….yes I cant imagine roasting myself on the beach in the sun….gives me a headache………….

Its so funny….I dont have time for anything…..you know a person can prioritize if he or she atleast has the time to do!!!!!!!! At some point my misery just becomes funny.

Anyways…..I dont like to grumble….there is nothing else happening in my life right now….will keep you guys posted……….I wish my next blog will start with something like…………………………………………………………

Yesterday I was on an island…………..with a mojito in one  hand and shopping bags in another…….waiting for my beloved’s chauffered car to come pick me………………hehehe……………………………..wishful thinking…….

Laugh

Life is funny .. and i love it .. i love every bit of problem it throws out at you ..

I laugh at how you think your life is going to be a shithole after that unfortunate and then life goes on

I laugh at how people waste their time in the ‘persuit of happiness’

I laugh at my foolishness

I laugh at my intelligent decisions

I laugh at my troubles

I laugh at my sorrows

I laugh at my happy moments

I laugh at how people take life so seriously

I laugh at how people think they can shange the world without doing anything towards it

I laugh at my thought of getting rich and famous marrying the prettiest girl and getting the most cutest kids

I laugh at how we assume the best

I laugh at how we assume the worst

I laugh at everything and anything and i want to know my someone wouldnt……

SOME EXCITEMENT

As the title suggests…..i need some!!!!

I am sure my dear friend Calvin will think rotten.

hehehe

Seriously…..if people see me at my work……they will be like….woman how much more excitement do you need……there is no time to even drink a proper glass of water…..

I really have no clue how I am handling it all….but then again I am a believer of taking each day as it comes. But there is no excitement left in life…I keep daydreamin on my way to work and back of extensive and expensive vacations I will take when I have the time and money….makes me feel good….

I never think of anything as impossible….that would be underestimating the human potential…i just want everything…..my dad calls me greedy…..i call myself a believer….I believe the first step towards getting something is wanting it….and keep on wanting it….more often than not people lose track of their lives because they forget what they want…or they think they are too  grown up for having such expectations from life….

For me every new expectation and every new desire is like starting my life all over again….its a very exhilarating experience…..to bounce back and forth between security and insecurity and emerging a winner every single time……those too scared of consequences wrap themselves and protect themselves with plastic foil of security…..have u ever felt truly free……thats when you are breathing through this foil…..

So be free and at peace!!!

Susan is back!!!!

I never really liked the name Susan……but I guess now I have to stick to it…hehe

Feels nice to be writing again……the past month has been full of ups and downs….things happened that actually made me  reset my priorities in life…..change my point of view a little bit. Things which were not important to me suddenly assumed importance.

You know sometimes things happen in your life that rock your soul…..rude awakenings…..i went through something like that……it was a good learning experience….

<> I feel more relaxed now…..more in touch with myself…..like a stable ship in a calm ocean. I still dont know where I am going but I know I will get there eventually.  I always let others shape me as an individual……living on other peoples expectations…..i lost my true self somewhere in the process…..and ended up like a blind man walking without his stick….I feel like I have found myself now….i am at peace with myself…..i feel good.

I still like all the things I liked previously…..but now I seem to connect truly to my likes and dislikes…..i know it sounds weird but its true….anyways theres more ahead ….more to enjoy and more to learn.

Hey I heard a beautiful song the other day….its very popular…..its called una palabra….try searching on youtube……its in spanish but if u understand broken spanish….it will touch your soul…..the tune is very beautiful……..

have fun and have faith!!!!

<><>

Music is dead :(

Ok for beginners , i cant play a musical instrument , i dont know the difference between Pavarotti and yanni ( am not even sure if the comparision is right)
In my small life span of 22 years i have heard i think a lot of genres of music primarl because my DAD was a big music buff and my mom though a not big music buff liked songs played constantly in the house , guess she liked to boogie.. =) I have sense of classical music , i have no sense of sur/tal ,antra/mukda( i was always confused when Anu kapoor in Antakashri asked such questions .. ). But i do know good music and bad music , i know that when i listen to music and i get goosebumps thats good music .. i know that when i listen to music and i cry a tear or smile a bit thats good music, I also know that when i listen to music and i start dancing thats good music.

I have a couple of ” instrument playing ” friends .. with due respect they have great talents , but for some damn reason they think that they have a better taste of music.. i mean fine i cant cook food , but that doesnt mean i dont know i dont know good food from bad.. !! well anyways this is not about them..

This is about the constantly degrading quality of music, where are the Rafi , Mukesh , Kishore , etc etc etc… have they just died has Indian music fallen to the ” hip hop” culture, I have nothing agianst it i love them in parties , and i hink they have amazing beats , but music hmmmm no i dont think so ..Music is a form of expression , when elton john says ” sorry , seems to be the hardest word ” Its magical , when Kishore sings ” Oh maaji re….. ” you just feel like you are on the bank of the river.Where is that music , I see some kind of music left in A R Rahman ..and to some extent Atif Aslam.. ( listen to some of his not so famous songs) .

I have been into the Rock scene since the time when it was supposed to be cool to be a ROCK fan .. i still like Pink flyod and will always .. they could make music out of a single string of guitar…!! they are easity the best that ever was. Music is not about racy tunes and hip griding , its about feelings and emotions and i have not seen any such songs off lately .. http://au.youtube.com/watch?v=wCF3ywukQYA is a classic example… =) its funny but then … come on…!!

If you guys have come across some good songs please let me know….!!!

rambling

Stonehearted …. I know there are a lot of people who call me that …. And a lot who say am extremely sentimental… and its so weird to find this two trains of thoughts about me .

I have always prioritized my life and that’s when you fall in trouble with some people most of the time because they may like it or not they are not my priority … like I have been always labeled and lazy ,…. And I have actually not gone on dates because I was too lazy to go that distance so would rather sleep… so my priority over here is sleep.. and it’s not like I hate that person .. I just love my sleep more.

Well keeping that aside I still feel the whole void of not being there ….. Like in the whole great scheme of things like parties and functions and all those places where if you take pictures and put them up on orkut you are considered cool… I don’t have a single pic with a girl in it …. Well with me,…. I actually have a large collection of girl pics… ehehhehe … and somehow.. I don’t regret it .. its weird I just am so happy that I slept and ate how much I could .. its so scary … !!

I think I have been successful in being stone hearted .. in its true sense… I can go back in my memories and say that no one will feel that I was an integral part of their good times and bad times… I tried my best to live as separate entity not because I am a introvert or something .. but I care too much sometime and have realized that sometimes its not worth it .. for that person .. No I have never been hurt deeply by anyone but I realized my foolishness of caring too much before it was too late.. I have made some enemies and I have made some friends …. And I wouldn’t like it any other way ..

:-(

Just had to cancel a trip to Vegas for next week. And then found out the ticket was non-refundable And what am I going to do for those 3 days that I was supposed to spend in Vegas- pack my bags and other things and prepare to move out of my current apartment. Wow fun!!!!!

Then have to leave the country in two months……thats going to be even more fun. I hate to fly period. To go home have to fly around 25 hours that is bad. Plus I will be alone….even worse.

Well I thought why not book business class for once since I was travelling alone but the tickets are more than three times expensive than regular ones.

So ummm overall today was bad!!!! Now if everyday was perfect life wouldnt be interesting, would it?????